I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
