Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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