hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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