There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
