Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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