I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize