im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
