How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
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