Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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