Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Alive.
So much puke
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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