dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
