Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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