singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
