I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
