You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
