Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Randomize
