never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
it was like having sex with a tree stump
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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