Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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