Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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