When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
