its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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