Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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