How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
