if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize