You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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