On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Just pee around me
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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