He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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