My balls are so social today.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
