Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
