My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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