hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize