Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
