DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
