I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize