we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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