i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
