Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
