And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
