Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize