i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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