Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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