Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
