there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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