Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Is it penis luge time yet?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
