Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
