i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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