So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
