If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
