You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
