I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
