dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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